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Precipitous Pagers (1999.12.30)
I wander back and forth, looking for Venessa and Rob and pretending to be evil. The Mansion may suck, but what is new. Turns out Venessa really does live in a mansion, though not the Mansion.

The Mouse Will Write (1999.12.29)
Tina leaves James and just may be indulging her bisexuality. Or not. Katie is away and I am trying to be social.

Reganomics and Such (1999.12.27)
I become a weepy bitch over American Pie, because Katie is gone. Erm. A salesgirl flirts with me, but I am too lovesick to process the situation. I discuss love as it pertained to Katie and Coley.

Sometimes It Be That Way (1999.12.16)
Katie seems to tie many of her pre-existing psychological conditions back to me. This is not the kind of relationship I want with her. She seems to want to "play" rather than be with me, but it doesn't solve anything. She seems to be devolving; changing just to change. She keeps playing psychological game and I will have nothing to do with that. She hides behind the excuses of her age and her lack of romantic experience.

Fondue In My Shoe (1999.12.11)
I have a raucous surprise party that I knew all about. Underage college students get plastered. I get chocolate fondue in my shoe. Virginia tries to mack it with Katie and me and ends up puking everywhere. I hope she doesn't make a habit of overindulgence; she's very bad at it. Happy birthday to me!

The Harpy, The Bitch, and The Bastard (1999.10.13)
It's a regular fairy tale as I narrate the on-going saga of Jen and Nick. I draw a picture of Katie and yammer pretentiously about it. The first appearance of Mabius and I hope the last.

Disillusionment (1999.10.04)
I discuss the supposed martyrdom of the kids at Columbine. I ain't buyin' it.

I Am Me, He Is a Conte (1999.09.13)
I am rather irked at my atrocious art teacher.

I Was Never Good At Endings (1999.09.07)
I write a one-act play detailing Katie's parents feelings on alternative religions. It's fun for the whole family.

Communications Is Key To a Healthy Relationship (1999.09.06)
I start at DCC as a Communications major. This may be a mistake. I get underlings at the Museum.

Secondary Sex Characteristics (1999.08.26)
I muse the nature of societal sex differences.

Parallel (1999.07.27)
I miss Katie very much. I hang out with the Cold Spring Cadre. I parallel park, which is immensely exciting. Conor is immensely excited just because I exist. I will get to sleep with Katie in Lake George.

Pic-i-nic (1999.07.20)
I plan for a picnic at Alison's house and mew over my Kitty.

Cold Spring Click (1999.07.09)
I praise Conor in the highest. Love that boy. Aria goes to Italy. Zanna becomes a lesbian to be pretentious. I plan for my vacation with Katie.

Missive Discontent (1999.06.10)
I wrote some letters to Kate that ended up causing a fight. This happens too damned much. The fighting, not the letter writing. Well, that happens too. My life is too complex to date right now...

Massive Discontent (1999.05.11)
I am not particularly happy with my relationship, Viva Improv!, college, and so on. On the up side, no one is dead. Well, except for Ellen.

Fearing The Zombie (1999.04.28)
I fret over the play I am directing. Oh, this is going to suck. Katie and I get sick, affecting my plans for a traditional fair and an untraditional circle. The museum raises my wages. I get a white buffalo for the departed Ellen.

Bast (1999.04.25)
I gush over Katie's increase, innate magickal receptivity. I like teaching her things I know, it makes me feel like we are closer. Coley suggests that we do sex magick, an idea I immediately nix to the inappropriateness. Coley seems a little fixated on the role of sex in magick. I simper a complaint about a ritual I did with a friend months ago.

Dana (1999.04.20)
I encounter and hug Nick's ex-girlfriend, whom I always got on famously with. She will be attending New Paltz with Katie and me. Katie was a little put off by the affection between Dana and me.

Distance (1999.04.11)
Katie visits a college in MA and I mope like I am on the Island of Misfit Toys. I am so in love with this girl. It's kind of pathetic, in a sweet way. The Fae visit me at work. People are actually nice to me at the Museum.

Jesus Healed The Cripples (1999.04.10)
I rail against not being crippled or a victim. It's all very unconvincing, actually. I swear not to destroy myself or let Katie destroy herself. Katie is a lifestyle to me, not merely a relationship. I compare Katie to Christ, because I go for subtlety in my imagery. I, however, am compared to a serial rapist/murderer from a psychological comic book. Nice. I say I will marry her, but I am not rushing things. I say we tranquilize me before I can write again, okay?

Thomm Quackenbush is an author and teacher in the Hudson Valley. Double Dragon publishes four novels in his Night's Dream series (We Shadows, Danse Macabre, and Artificial Gods, and Flies to Wanton Boys). He has sold jewelry in Victorian England, confused children as a mad scientist, filed away more books than anyone has ever read, and tried to inspire the learning disabled and gifted. He is capable of crossing one eye, raising one eyebrow, and once accidentally groped a ghost. When not writing, he can be found biking, hiking the Adirondacks, grazing on snacks at art openings, and keeping a straight face when listening to people tell him they are in touch with 164 species of interstellar beings. He likes when you comment.



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