Skip to content

05.24.02 7:40 p.m.

"Every step has been painful and insane and pretty much shaken my faith in humanity. I also don't trust caribou anymore. They're out there, on the tundra, waiting... Something's going down. I'm right about this."


 -Joss Whedon  




Previously in Xenology: Emily was. So were Liz and Melissa.

Weird Day
I was hanging out with Melissa and Liz a few days ago. Melissa was extraordinarily happy because of her new job and coworkers. One in particular, but I lack clearance to continue in this vein.
We went to Rolling Rock to get some snacks. They called me by name away from the lobby, where I was fantasizing about the claw machine with its many laser pointers. The waitress who was assigning them a table exclaimed my full name by means of inquisition. I have a relatively common name (no, Xen is not my legal name), so I see no reason why this girl should think anyone by that name should be me. I imagined for a moment that whenever she hears my first name in any social situation she says my full name loudly owing to some sort of Pavlovian conditioning, but that may just be me.
I walked over and was rather baffled as to whom this lass was and why she seemed to know me. Evidently, by her telling, she knew me through her friend Audrey whom I had not really spoken to at any length since I was sixteen. She fondly and loudly recalled me once preaching an excerpt of the Tool song Disgustipated in the food court of the mall. For the curious of you, the excerpt was:

And the angel of the lord came unto me, snatching me up from my place of slumber. And took me on high, and higher still until we moved to the spaces betwixt the air itself. And he brought me into a vast farmland of our own Midwest. And as we descended, cries of impending doom rose from the soil. One thousand, nay a million voices full of fear. And terror possessed me then. And I begged, "Angel of the Lord, what are these tortured screams?" And the angel said unto me, "These are the cries of the carrots, the cries of the carrots! You see, Reverend Maynard, tomorrow is harvest day and to them it is the holocaust." And I sprang from my slumber drenched in sweat like the tears of one million terrified brothers and roared, "Hear me now, I have seen the light! They have a consciousness, they have a life, they have a soul! Damn you! Let the rabbits wear glasses! Save our brothers!" Can I get an amen? Can I get a hallelujah? Thank you Jesus.
I was an eccentric 15 year old, I do not deny this. However, seriously, this is six years latter and this girl expected a repeat performance in the center of a crowded restaurant. I declined, stating that I could not remember it (of course, I could, but there was no need to let this girl know that). I do hope she has progressed from when she first saw this performance.
Later that day, we were driving Liz back to her car when we spotted a small, incredibly fast moving creature running in a way that almost seemed like it was floating. Liz screamed that it was a bunny, but we realized that the rabbit would have hopped not darted in a straight line. So she suggested it could have been a lemur bunny. This seemed as reasonable as anything.
 
We didn't know and neither did they.
We continued to drive along, discussing the strangeness of the lemur bunny, when Melissa spotted two young boys in full army fatigues sitting on the side of the street. There seemed no rhyme or reason to this sight, so we turned around to snap a picture of them and inquire as to what they were doing. The kiddy commandos claimed ignorance of their actions. Melissa informed me that she saw them again today, only there were more of them and they were selling lemonade. Her theory is that so many people stopped to ask them what they were doing that they decided to capitalize off of it.
If this weren't enough, we later saw hot air balloons. However, when we tried to get closer, they would disappear. Hot air balloons cannot descend fast enough to have evaded us, but these ones clearly did. Stranger is that there were at least two separate balloons. We just couldn't understand.
It was a weird day.


Soon in Xenology: M's belief in fairies. Trying to hang out with Venessa. New claddaugh ring. Loving M more. Being on a diet. OtherZack. Laura.

last watched: O
reading: Lasher: Lives of the Mayfair Witches
listening: Elza
wanting: To return to Pine Bush.
interesting thought: a wee piece of silver can make me so happy.
moment of zen: going out to lunch with M.
someday I must: run a marathon.

Thomm Quackenbush is an author and teacher in the Hudson Valley. Double Dragon publishes four novels in his Night's Dream series (We Shadows, Danse Macabre, and Artificial Gods, and Flies to Wanton Boys). He has sold jewelry in Victorian England, confused children as a mad scientist, filed away more books than anyone has ever read, and tried to inspire the learning disabled and gifted. He is capable of crossing one eye, raising one eyebrow, and once accidentally groped a ghost. When not writing, he can be found biking, hiking the Adirondacks, grazing on snacks at art openings, and keeping a straight face when listening to people tell him they are in touch with 164 species of interstellar beings. He likes when you comment.



eXTReMe Tracker