the religious differences between goths and catholics
Goths will actually go to heaven. You see, Goths are the chosen people. Emo kiddies are like the Jews. They suffer and lament, but God keeps tormenting them because, well, even deities need hobbies. God really, really hates LiveJournals. Salivate over the complete works of Anton LeVay all you want, just don't post pictures of your cat on the internet and whine about how you are so misunderstood. Yaweh will be sure to give you something to cry about.
Punks are like the Puritans, radical disciples who look down at everyone else. They are way more extreme than God requires and end up annoying a lot of people with their fervor. God will let them into heaven, but only to give the emo kids something else about which to feel persecuted. He hates them so much with their floppy, asymmetrical hair and self-important Friendster profiles.
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