Thomm Quackenbush, author

Say Anything

Hey Xen, I made you a pie. Why are you looking at me like that? No, please don't wake a href=http://www.xenex.org/chara/emilys.php">Emily up. Friends can talk to each other at four in the morning, or is that a crime now too? God, I forgot how beautiful you look when you get out of bed. When did you start shaving your body hair? Was that one of her ideas? I know Emily made you get the restraining order. Do you really think a piece of paper is going to tell me that I can't love you anymore? Answer me, damn it. People like you are the reason the world is a horrible place to live in. You come along and break the hearts of everyone you meet. I saw the way you looked at me when I used to mow my lawn in my Speedos. You wanted me then. No, we can't talk about this later. Okay fine, I'm going. There's no need to call the police. I just want you to know one thing. My heart is a beautiful place filled with every moment we shared with each other. Emily may have told you differently, she might even call me psychologically dangerous, but she has no idea of the pain I will bring you. You've broken my heart, but I've broken every finger on my right hand. The pain is for you. Everything is for you. Just say something. Say anything.

Lloyd Dobler is an optimist with a crush on his high school valedictorian. Unfortunately, Lloyd is also a compulsive loser who wears a trench coat and thinks that sitting across from someone at the mall is the same as a date. Diane Court, on the other hand, is a good girl who has a way of stringing along losers. When Lloyd gets his dream of a date with Diane and the two hit it off, the world turns out to have a little bit of hope left in it. Unfortunately, Diane's father has too much invested in her future. Over the years, he's secretly stolen money from the retirement home he runs and the IRS is finally catching up. Can newfound love survive the invasion from the United States government? It sure can. Hollywood loves happy endings, as do people who receive back rubs in Asia.

John Cusack, who plays Lloyd, is a master at the portrayal of the romantic underdog. This role offers nothing new to his career in terms of range, but still remains as one of his most remembered performances. The plot for the movie itself is completely insane, in that it forces the audience to believe that new love is stronger then adversity, which is optimistic to say the least. Cameron Crowe, no relation to The Crow, directed the movie and managed to tell the story without drawing on clichés of the genre. Sure, it's a romantic comedy and, at times, the dialogue will have you calling for the severed heads of your exes, but Say Anything remains charming.

Say Anything is one of those classic love comedies from the 1980's that people quote from at their weddings. It's up there on my personal list of favorites and if you give it a shot, you'll agree.

Your Moment of Insanity:

You must chill. You must chill. I have hidden your keys, chill.

You Should Look Out For:

  1. According to the film, kickboxing is the sport of tomorrow. Well, welcome to tomorrow and kickboxing still sucks.
  2. Women friends will talk about you behind your back. This is why all my friends are cats. Isn't that right, my precious little Omen?
  3. If you find yourself driving around at night lament about a relationship, then maybe you need to find some kind of counseling.
  4. Lloyd lifts a boom box over his head and plays a Peter Gabriel song in hopes of causing Diane to fling herself from her second story window onto a bed of nails set up under her ledge. This is how I interpreted it.
  5. Okay, I never cry at the movies but, in the last scene when Lloyd and Diane are in the plane, I just wanted to believe in love again.

Did You Know:

The DVD's commentary contains John Cusack, Ione Skye, and director Cameron Crowe.

A Stevehenish Tagline:

Watch Lloyd stalk his prey, before savagely kicking them in the groin.

You Will Fall in Love Only To Have Your Heart Stomped to Death By Monkeys

  1. The Truth About Cats and Dogs
  2. Chasing Amy
  3. Sixteen Candles

Words Thrown Together in Hopes of Pulling in Random Google Users

"If Someone Follows You"


Stevehen J. Warren is a trained professional in dealing with the crap society churns out. If possible, do not attempt to engage any crap you may find. He mocks it so you don't have to.

If you have a movie, picture, website, friend, game, book, fan fiction, or toilet you would like me to see, or crap all over, please inform your friendly webmaster and include your name and the name of the crappee. The numbers are open and we have trained professionals waiting to receive your call.



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Works by Thomm Quackenbush

The Night's Dream Series

We Shadows by Thomm Quackenbush

Danse Macabre by Thomm Quackenbush

Artificial Gods by Thomm Quackenbush