Thomm Quackenbush, author

Ron Paul 2012

This needs to get nipped in the bud before it happens. Seriously, guys, I know you are getting tired of my crazy political ramblings and at some point the three people in the Internet who still read this will go outside and look at the sun or something, but for the record: Ron Paul has lost his fucking mind. There's no gleeful smile across my face, no usual sense of sarcasm, just an odd feeling that allowing this man to continue at the helm of the Internet will only lead to the tragic end of the human race.

The medical doctor who thinks global warming is a conspiracy between volcanoes, evolution is a crock, sticking it to man by voting "no" on an increase in the minimum wage in 2007, abstaining on a vote that allowed eavesdropping without a court order, voting against a bill that would use a tax on cigarettes to fund children health care, and kicking puppies into bathtubs filled with electronic products has finally done something so insane I take it upon myself to attempt to wrap my mind around it. He makes the boys and girls in the 14th district of Texas proud and as we all know Texas is the retarded armpit of the country where rational thought goes to salute the Confederate flag before masturbating itself to death on its own ineptitude. Remember, guys, secession is a viable solution to anything the liberal media throws and, by all means, after you. Ron Paul however will never be the President, not because the system is set up against him or because the rest of us subscribe to the theory that big government needs to keep us in check. It's because he's a stupid douchebag. If one would create a bill that could end world hunger and increase the funding to the UN by one dollar, rest assured, Ron Paul would hit the asshole switch and fuck it up for everyone. He's a man of principles. Isolationist insane principles, but principles nevertheless.

Maybe I'm being a bit rash, maybe there's an argument to the outsider mentality. After the tragedy in Haiti, Congress declared America's support for the nation. It passed with the full might of the Congress. I mean, who would be insane enough to vote against this toothless symbol of support? Ron Paul would. He voted against it. This was not a law. In truth, there was no legal bindings attached to it. They were words of condolences. Words of compassion. Ron Paul took his wacko literal translation and declared it as a promise to fund the relief from our pocket. He's a bit of a tool. However, the real tragedy of this whole scenario is that he's allowed to be a tool because of people like you and, yes, I mean you.

Maybe I'm wrong, though. Maybe Ron Paul has actual supporters out there, and by supporters I do not mean border nuts, creationist, gun nuts, 9/11 conspiracy nuts, supposed Independents who always vote Republican, Internet Trolls, racists, people who are racist but are afraid to admit it to themselves, DINO, people who refer to the Civil War as the War of Northern Aggression, state right advocates who don't see segregation as a complete fuck-up when in comes to state rights, lizard people believers and college kids who have Ron Paul on some sort of bong. It is important to note some of the reactions of this guy on the Internet, for strictly humorous purposes, of course.

"Dr. Paul chokes me up all the time. It cuts me to the quick that everyone doesn't know him and then accept him as seems only reasonable for everyone's own good. It confuses me no end when seemingly intelligent people do know him and don't accept what he says. It is unfathomable."

"I look forward to the breakdown of our Union not only just to put the federal government in check but for also states to compete for inhabitants...May the freest state win!"

"I think 9-11 is the cornerstone to bringing down the whole house of cards. I will not support, in any way, any candidate who can not speak intelligently about that event. They do not have to 'agree' per se, but nearly every politician wants us all to pretend it did not happen. It happened. It made a lot of toher things happen, and I want to know what they think about it all. Do I need to discuss it here? Not any more. There was a time, but now all it does is start fights."

It's a crazy mad sandwich of just all of the insane aspects of society coming together and supporting this guy. No, if I were rational, respectful Ron Paul and I saw people like this supporting me, I would do my best to shuffle away. There's a problem, if he sends the wackos away, he becomes just like every other politician. He needs them, and that is what makes this whole thing a giant comedy dance.

Your Musical Moment Provided By David Gray
If you want it. Come and get it. Crying out loud. The love that I was giving you was never in doubt.

Stevehen J. Warren is a trained professional in dealing with the crap society churns out. If possible, do not attempt to engage any crap you may find. He mocks it so you don't have to.

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