Thomm Quackenbush, author

Inappropriate Use of Public Domain Pictures 07

Benjamin Bear: Now take a bite of the pudding. There we go, nice big spoonful. Isn't that better? Do you feel the power growing inside of you? It begins small, like an echo from a far away thunderclap. Soon, you'll feel the vibrations, and then you'll lift off into the sky.

Sparkles the Cat: It's delicious, but I don't feel any different.

Benjamin Bear: Well, have some more. There's more than enough for everyone. Think of it as your apple into the world of knowledge, the key to the lock of the inner subconscious.

Fiddle Rabbit: Benjamin Bear, I must insist, Sparkles the Cat has had enough.

Benjamin Bear: I'll be the judge of that, Mr. Fiddle Rabbit. No reason to let your inhibitions ruin his good time. Your journey is just a different one from his, the goal of enlightenment remains the same.

Mr. Donnie Duckling: Yes feed my wife, Parrot, feed her while I watch.

Parrot: Soon you will watch more!

Benjamin Bear: The orgy will begin soon enough. First, we must enter the place where our minds open to the starship. Once aboard the starship, the orgy will begin.

Percival the Puppy: Guys, I don't want to be the mood killer, but we got the FUCKING CONFEDERATE ARMY COMING THIS WAY. Let's arm some cannons and rape these guys back to the Dark Ages.

Fiddle Rabbit: I've had enough of this, there's no army.

Benjamin Bear: If our friend sees a mass of soldiers, are we wrong to believe him? Ponder that question for a few moments.

Percival the Puppy: Yeah it's not an army, my bad, it's a lollipop. Kill the whole cannon thing. Sorry, freaking out a little.

Benjamin Bear: The building fire of the orgy will do that, as will the pudding laced with LSD.


Stevehen J. Warren is a trained professional in dealing with the crap society churns out. If possible, do not attempt to engage any crap you may find. He mocks it so you don't have to.

If you have a movie, picture, website, friend, game, book, fan fiction, or toilet you would like me to see, or crap all over, please inform your friendly webmaster and include your name and the name of the crappee. The numbers are open and we have trained professionals waiting to receive your call.



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Works by Thomm Quackenbush

Anthologies

Find What You Love and Let It Kill You by Thomm Quackenbush
Pagan Standard Times: Essays on the Craft by Thomm Quackenbush
A Creature Was Stirring: A Twisted Christmas Anthology by Thomm Quackenbush
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